So yesterday we had a situation come up at my sons school. It was a pretty serious situation, one that could have ended a completely different way. And this is where I am extremely happy we are active and involved parents.
I won’t go in to detail to protect everyone involved, but let’s just say it gave Ike and myself extreme pause. It was one of those moments where being black kind of slapped you in the face, like don’t ever think you can just survive on your brain alone.
We’ve had a muted talk with D-boy before about race and where he stands. Never going more indepth because it wasn’t necessary at that time. The hardest part about talking with him is he is a literal person, it is either or there isn’t a such thing as a gray area. My child is crazy smart… Book smart that is. The rest we have to teach and it’s hard. For him, he needs to see it in writing. It can’t be something you learned from the streets because he didn’t catch it.
Last night as we sat and gave him the unedited version of what it means to be a black boy in America, it hurt my soul to the core. We officially took away the last of his innocence… I know it might seem crazy to some. But because I lost my childhood at such a young age, I promised myself my children would stay as young and innocent as possible. Letting them enjoy their childhood for as long as possible. Though it hurts, I’m glad we had until he was almost 15 years old.
I’m not saying his childhood is gone, I’m just saying we’ve crossed that line where we are 100% responsible to now having him learn to differentiate between good and bad. We’ve had a strong hand in who his friends are and who he associates with. Making sure that any bad influence disappeared. He is at a point in his life where we won’t know most of the people he hangs out with at school, because it’s only at school. We won’t know who he talks to outside of this house because he’s a teen and sometimes they just don’t talk. We are guiding him, telling him to learn and pause for a second and make a better decision. Because as you get older the decisions will get harder and their will be peer pressure as well as potentially more harsh consequences.
We know he leads with his heart, which in most cases, is perfectly fine. But in those other cases, that’s where that extra second of a pause could be the difference between coming home or not. I’m very happy his end result today was nothing but him being given a life lesson. And the understanding that next time it might not be daddy’s friend calling and giving us the information, even though it was in an official capacity.
Last night we all learned a valuable lesson. I’m so thankful it was at this time & with no other consequences involved. I was pretty upset by the events that took place, but lawd! It is sooo much easier then the talk I will have to have with my girls before high school. For now, I will leave that conversation where it lay. In the future.
Love, peace and hair grease…